peebee's journal

[peebee]

hi vicki and dollybaby63 - thanks for info re colon, ive tried pshylium husk before, it takes a bit of getting used to but its ok.

10/11/06 - day 5

well, ive had another really good day...scales went down again so im pleased as punch.

ive worked out that i just simply cant do this over the weekend, me and husband at home all day together, hes going to notice that im not eating so ive reconciled myself to the fact that im just going to have to break the fast and eat.

i plan to do raw and natural....salad etc, not too much quantity.

this should please my husband and not rouse any suspicions.

i fully intend to get back to it monday....not going to do any wine over the weekend either, i find this weakens my resolve.

anyway, got to dash....love to you all xxx

[GravitationGirl]

Today is the first day of my fast, I've done some fake-eating (chewing and then spitting out and rinsing out mouth) but otherwise no calories!


Awesome job peebee, you're doing amazing.

[peebee]

gravitationgirl - all my love to you on the fast....its all in the power of the mind ! nobody loves their food more than i do and even i have survived 5 days without a scrap.

im not really looking forward to 'having' to eat....i wanted to last out till thurs/fri but it wasnt meant to be....i could have done it, i know i could, just circumstances got in the way but not to worry as im starting again on monday next week till friday.

the most amazing thing is the ammount of weight ive lost in only 5 days, i recon its aprox 11 lbs so pretty good (for me anyway)

have a lovely weekend all......xxx

[peebee]

11/11/06 - broke my fast last night (i didnt have a choice !)

BUT HERES THE BEST BIT.......

i have a cunning plan !

so, i ate with my husband last night and afterward, i said that i fell sick (which i did a little) so that means that i can continue to feel ill this weekend and he wont be alarmed at my not eating (im such a clever girl). i can simply tell him that ive got an upset stomach and as he saw me eat friday evening, he wont think anything of it.

and the good news is that i only put on 0.25 of a pound when i weighed myself this morning so its a win-wind situation all round.

back to the fast today, im still feeling mentally strong and dont have any cravings. i hope to continue until friday lunch time next week (thats when i go away with my girlfriends).

so ive managed a 5 day fast (broken in the evening) and hopefully this is the start of a 6 day fast.....watch this space.

[DollyAna]

hey good luck this weekend...

[peebee]

well, last night all went a bit 'pete tong'....bugger !

(ate nothing all day till 7pm)

all day yesterday, my husband kept asking 'food' questions....

what are we having to eat this evening?
would you like me to go to the supermarket to buy in the groceries?
do you fancy white or red wine with the meal tonight?

he was driving me insane !!!!!!!!!

so, i was a good wife, made the evening meal, sat and ate together, then while everyone helped themselves to 2nds, i dashed upstairs and purged it all out !!!!! that is sooooooo bad !!!!!i cant believe i did it, i know that is bad to purge but i just didnt know what else to do.

so today is another day....i made up an excuse and said that i had the runs yesterday evening so im definately going to tell him that im not eating today as im feeling a bit iffy.

[desirable dream]

(((((((((hugs)))))))))

Well done on being so determined on your fast!

It's a shame that you had to purge though, best not to get into that habit if you can help it. That's the trouble when people who care about us are watching - we have no choice but to conform to what they want rather than what we want. We eat or not eat, to pleasethem. Wheich is stupid. It's our bodies, we ought to be able to control what we feed them.

But I guess it's only because they care and don't understand.

But that's an amzing amount of weight to lose, well done! It's making me very tempted to fast, but I don't think I could with college and lectures and exercising. Dunno.

I'm being stricter with myself, though. Lot's of raw veg and soup, hopefully it will get me back on track.

Best of luck with the rest of the fast

[DollyAna]

hello hun,sorry to hear that you had to purge but i would've done the same thing,infact i did used to do the same thing...

[zayif]

wow, well done with your fantastic will power and weight loss.

i'm only on day two, raw veg (limited) and limited soup, and coffee, trying to make myself like green tea - does anyone know if it really does help speed up weight loss?

i'm sure you'll carry on doing brilliantly,
thanks for the inspiration

[peebee]

thanks desirable, dollybaby63 and zayif - hope you are all well.

so, sunday followed a pattern similar to saturday - no food all day, cooked evening meal then purged (again ! im so sorry - id like to say that i didnt but that would be telling a lie).

ive worked out, that for me, its all about control (or lack of it).

i havent been in control this weekend, my husband has - he has been controlling the fact that ive had to eat - which is a reason that i purged as i didnt actually want to eat ! (if that makes any sense?).

anyway, the weekend is over and i can get back to my routine.

so, today i went to the gym (hips/bums/tums class) which was great.

im still food free and feel ok. got my personal training session tomorow so think that i will buy myself an energy drink....it means that im still liquid only and hopefully this will see me through the session without passing out !

i dont intend to do this 'not eating' forever....id just like to loose some more weight and feel that im 'normal' .....whatever that is/means.

i hate myself when i overeat and get big so im not going to go there any more....famous last words.

when i get to 'slimsville' then i hope to stay there, spend some time enjoying myself, being healthy, eating healthy....all those things that seem to be just a dream....but you never know....maybe one day.

[DollyAna]

hello sweetie,i totally know where you're coming from & i just wanted to wish you lots of luck,take care. PS;sorry but i'm unable to read PM's,all i get is a blank white screen,i did report it to admin but i still can't read them...

[peebee]

14/11/06 - woke up feeling like my shed had collapsed ! thick,fuzzy head and glazed eyes. had my energy drink before personal training session but saw my sister at the gym and went to the cafe bar for a coffee and a bagel post workout !!!!!

i actually felt better post bagel and workout but im suffering the consequences now.....have big food cravings so made myself a low cal hot choc and have come upstairs to update my journal as way of distraction.

weighed myself this morning and scales have gone down again - good !
4 people have commented on my weight loss so its obvious to others but not really to me...i sat in my car and looked down at my chunky legs today...even though ive lost some weight, im still big...theres no choice but to keep going i guess ?

i hope that all my other journal browsing buddies are well today, love to you all xxx

[desirable dream]

Well things are obviously working for you at the moment, well done!

And don't worry about that bagel, just think how well you've done on your first ever fast! Lasting as long as you didis a real achievement (if that makes sense! I mean that as a compliment, blah! Oh you know what I mean, well done!).

So what happens now? Are you back on the fast until your girls weekend or are you going to start introducing some food back in?

I'm going on my first fast at the mo, it's day 1 and I'm amazed that I got through a whole full day of lectures and swimming this evening, without eating! I have had some squash and milky tea though (no sugar) and am now following in your footsteps and having a low cal hot chocolate. But the calories from these still won't add up to too much

I'll chat more about this in my journal, rather than filling up yours, he he he!

[peebee]

go desirable dream !

i will monitor your fasting progress with enthusiasm via your journal....its really not that bad once you get going, youve got to trust and believe me that if i can do it then anyone can.

if you can busy yourself most of the day and make it past tea time then youve cracked it.

often, i would get to say 8pm and think to myself....'youve only bloody gone and done it !' if you can get to that time of night having been food free all day then theres NO WAY that you could throw the towel in is there ?

i hope to stay food free from now till friday when i go away with the girls...im not sure that this is the best plan....but if i re introduce food before friday i will feel like ive failed.

ps. the designer jeans that have been sat in my wardrobe since february (never been worn, button popped off) now fit -hurray....there is a god !!!

[DollyAna]

hello hun,i'm pleased for you that the scales have gone down & it must be nice when people comment that you're looking slimmer,you just got to keep going babe & i'm here rooting for you...